|
Jeremy and I were in a used
book store in the Mission. We were poking through the pile of recent
arrivals, and he was trying very hard to to decide which book to buy,
``
Ninja Mind Control,'' or
``
Ninja Secrets of Invisibility.''
Then from the front of the store, I overheard the following conversation:
| She: |
I have to write this paper.
|
|---|
| He: |
Yeah, on what?
|
|---|
| She: |
Like, identity?
|
|---|
| He: |
Uh huh?
|
|---|
| She: |
So like remember that girl I was telling you about, the one
who gave a blowjob to that guy from that band, Marilyn Manson?
|
|---|
| He: |
Uh huh, yeah, yeah?
|
|---|
| She: |
Well like, they all use different
names, right?
Because they're like, ``hey, I'm a rock
star, that's who I am,''
right?
|
|---|
| He: |
Yeah?
|
|---|
| She: |
So this girl, she was backstage, and like, she signed
his name on a mirror.
|
|---|
| He: |
Yeah?
|
|---|
| She: |
So I was thinking, like, I'd write my paper on that.
That'd be so cool.
|
|---|
| He: |
Yeah!
|
|---|
|
I was in the hell that is High School. One of my more fashion-forward
classmates was wearing a baggy white t-shirt that said
CHOOSE LIFE
in huge black letters. Now, we understood what those
frankie say
RELAX
t-shirts were all about, but aside from the fact that a pair of gay
bubblegum pop stars wore these shirts in a video once, what the hell did
``choose life'' mean?
One of my friends decided he had to know. I witnessed the following
conversation between him and a girl who would never otherwise have
spoken to him:
| He: |
So what does your shirt mean?
|
|---|
| She: |
It means, like, ``Choose Life,'' duh.
(withering look.)
|
|---|
| He: |
Well yeah, but what does that mean?
|
|---|
| She: |
What do you think I am, a phil-o-soph-er or something?
|
|---|
Philosopher was four words. Fill Loss Oh Fur.
|
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