Today in "Hot Superyacht Probs" (literally)

A brand-new £20m superyacht has been destroyed by fire just weeks after it was delivered to its multimillionaire owner, the Italian car industry boss Paolo Scudieri.

Seven crew members and nine passengers on the ship were unharmed and evacuated to other boats nearby, but the Aria is thought to be unsalvageable. [...]

The yacht, which had a gym and a pool and could accommodate up to 10 guests across five staterooms, was delivered to Scudieri late last month.

Scudieri's suite on the main deck included a private lounge with a skylight, a terrace and direct access to an outdoor lounge via a private staircase.

Because of course it did. You absolutely need a private staircase to keep you away from the unwashed masses on your yacht. Some before photos.

Searching for this also, sadly, led me to this article:

Burning Man-Inspired Superyacht Proves Anything Is Possible:

Video game designer and entrepreneur Dave Hagewood's newly relaunched GALAXY is the ultra-luxe, Burning Man-inspired, superyacht spaceship the young, first-time superyacht owner always knew he wanted. [...]

"The design concept was always about Dave and Danielle's love of life, passion for creating their own community like they find at Burning Man, and gifting everyone who steps onboard an energy that's pure and unforgettable. GALAXY is their very own spaceship." [...]

Hagewood also brings some fresh perspective to superyacht ownership as well. "There are lot of yachts out there that are very private, very closed. And there are lots of people that are kind of just retired and sailing off into the sunset," he says. "But there are a few that are really looking for our kind of energy. And we love meeting new people."

Ooooohhhhhhhhh, so it's a fuckyacht. I'll bet that no superyacht owner has ever considered the possibility of that before.

"Their passion for outer space and that feeling of being in another world meant so much, GALAXY became this, but it's also their home on the water," Colbon adds. "It touches the senses from head to toe, especially in the main salon, which can be their very own private members club, a super comfortable space to chill in the afternoon, a movie theater, and then transform into a nightclub where Dave can play his latest music track."

I am not going to search for Dave's Latest Music Track. I will leave that as an exercise for the reader.

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17 Responses:

  1. thielges says:
    1

    Wow that is some serious pandering by the refurbishment team.  Star signs of the owners on the headboard?    Ooooo.    What will they think of next?   How about a crass mashup of Koons and Rodin stinking up the lounge?

    “…how cool exploring the world on a large yacht …”: not so sure a yacht is the best vehicle for that.   I’m guessing it will allow you to explore 0.01% of the world where you will find the same 0.01% of people hanging out in the marina’s yacht club.  

    • Elusis says:

      0.01% of the world where you will find the same 0.01% of people

      As far as That Fucking Guy is concerned, this is the definition of "the world."

  2. Big says:

    > I’m guessing it will allow you to explore 0.01% of the world where you will find the same 0.01% of people hanging out

    Curiously enough, I bet that’s exactly the same way they “explored” Burningman…

  3. tfb says:

    I don't think the 'private staircase' thing is weird.

    From, I think, the 18th century on, country houses had an increasing amount of separation between servants and owners, to the extent that mid-late 19th century houses had two complete networks of corridors/staircases/doors etc, one for the owners and another invisible one for the servants, who would thus never be seen unless called upon (and of course there were a special class or servants who were the ones who were called upon: the owners would never see the people who cleaned at all (and of course, the more senior servants had servants)).

    So this is just that.  Of course 'not weird' does not mean 'not offensive'.

    • phuzz says:

      Or maybe the designer realised that the only way to access that bit of deck was by putting a staircase in the main bedroom, so they sold it to the client as a 'private staircase'.

  4. matt says:

    Accommodates 10 passengers, but had a crew of 7. That’s a high crew:passenger ratio, isn’t it?

  5. jwz says:
    2

    Actual footage of the Burning Man Yacht has been uncovered:

  6. prefetch says:

    It really is baffling that boat fires are still a thing. Anyone can go to a big box store with a small fistful of cash and buy a firefighting-rated water pump that will move the contents of a lake or dam in seconds. Rarely do you hear the question "Quick, where's the nearest body of water?" on a boat.

    • kudzu surfer says:
      1

      It turns out boats have this weird tendency to sink if you put enough water into them to put out a fire.

    • madcap says:

      You know that you should not put water into burning oil, don't you?

    • prefetch says:

      It turns out boats have this weird tendency to sink if you put enough
      water into them to put out a fire.

      Only if they don't have a bilge pump. Granted, fireproof bilge pumps are a challenge, but it's nothing superyacht-level money can't solve.

      You know that you should not put water into burning oil, don't you?

      Indeed. That's why we offer customers a full range of fire suppressant systems, built directly into the interior of your yacht, with no unsightly valves or sprinklers. All our systems use the latest in inert chemical technology, which are completely safe for you and your guests (no need to evacuate!) and require no post-deployment clean-up. Our cloud-based sensing service will immediately activate your suppression system as soon as a fire is detected (subscription and data fees apply).

      It's like they're actively throwing away upselling revenue.

      • kudzu surfer says:

        Why not just use the bilge pumps to put out the fire? I just looked up 'bilge pump' on Wikipedia and that looks like it would definitely for sure work. All this stuff is really easy, I don't understand why nobody has tried it before.

  7. johannes says:
    1

    The fuckyacht looks like Saul Goodman's house.

  8. Dim says:

    We are certainly living in a golden age for superyacht problems:

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