DNA Lounge: Wherein the Castro Theatre is the latest COVID casualty

The Castro Theatre is turning over control to Another Planet:

The 100-year-old theater, known throughout the world as one of the symbols of San Francisco's historic LGBTQ Castro neighborhood, will be renewed as a live events venue with music, comedy, film and more as Another Planet Entertainment takes over its programming.

The Berkeley independent [sic] concert promotion company -- which promotes hundreds of local concerts annually at venues like Berkeley's Greek Theatre, the Fox Theater in Oakland and the Bill Graham Civic Auditorium in San Francisco, as well as co-produces the Outside Lands music festival in Golden Gate Park -- has signed a long-term contract, with plans to [...] broaden the programming at the 1,400-capacity venue to include live music, comedy and community events. The Castro will still screen select films, but the changes are sure to be earthshaking for many Bay Area film organizations and movie fans who have been filling the Castro for decades.

"It's heartbreaking, devastating, and not surprising," said Marc Huestis, who has presented special events at the Castro Theatre for 40 years. [...] "Even before COVID, it was like repertory theater was kind of on its last legs," Huestis continued. "It makes me very emotional because it's just such an important cultural institution and the heartbeat of not only the neighborhood but of the city."

As a fan of both old movies and live music, one might expect me to feel conflicted about this. While losing another repertory movie theatre is awful, gaining another live music venue should be good, right? But, no, this is just another tragedy. Understandable, perhaps, but still tragic.

I don't understand how anyone gets away with calling Another Planet an "independent" company, unless your definition of "independent" is "not publicly traded". I guess NIVA defines "independent" as "anyone who is not Live Nation or AEG", but the reality is that Another Planet are the short leg of the corporate triad who monopolize the live music scene in the Bay Area and beyond.

It's true that APE is the smallest of the three, and they're "local", but they have the same business model as Live Nation and AEG: anti-competitive lock-in through vertical integration and festival radius clauses. They're still monopolists, they're just smaller.

And even though whatever kind of live music they end up doing at The Castro won't be the sort of thing that we do at DNA Lounge -- we're not a "1,400 capacity all-seated" kind of place -- this sort of corporate consolidation hurts all of us small businesses who are actually independent, because it increases APE's monopoly power.

As I explained in detail back in 2018, monopolies are bad. They are bad for consumer choice, they are bad for ticket pricing, they are bad for artists getting paid, they are bad for your local music scene, and they are bad for our culture as a whole.

But as with Slim's (RIP) and Mezzanine (RIP), it's hard to fault the Castro's owners for taking whatever Faustian bargain is offered. It's grim out there.

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Crawling toward obscurity

Now, Eternals was bad -- and I've already had some words about that -- but I have not yet seen anyone bust on the opening crawl.

Which is CLEARLY an, uh, homage to Blade Runner (violating the cardinal rule of cover songs, "never remind the audience of a better band they could be watching instead") but so ham-handed that it does not replicate (see what I did there?) the MOST RECOGNISABLE features of that crawl: its own bizarrely mismatched fonts!

If you're gonna goof on something, goof on it right!

It's like -- whichever intern got assigned the job of "hey pal, go fake-up a Blade Runner crawl" looked at it and was like, hmmmmm, it looks like whoever did this accidentally screwed up the fonts, while I am immitating this thing I had better correct their error."

Now you may recall that I have some Opinions about Blade Runner, but let me now turn the mic over to the eminently more qualified Typeset In The Future:

Blade Runner's opening crawl is distinctly un-futuristic in its choice of font. It uses Goudy Old Style -- designed by Frederic W. Goudy in 1915 -- as part of a veritable typographic cornucopia. Within five-and-a-bit paragraphs, we are treated to several inconsistently spaced examples of small caps), and five -- count them! -- examples of particularly chunky em dashes. (Thankfully, they do not follow the freaky American style of removing -- for no reason at all -- their surrounding spaces.)

My favorite aspects of this opening crawl, however, are the arbitrary examples of Mid-Sentence Capitalized Words, as popularized by A. A. Milne and P. L. Travers.

I mean. Gestures Wildly.

By the way, the Eternals Pitch Meeting is very good.

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