B-hind

B‒hind offers a unique Internet of Things (IoT) solution to fully integrate your sphincter muscle in everyday living.

The revolutionary anal electrode-powered interface system replaces conventional hand and voice-based device interaction and enables advanced digital control rooted in the interiors of your body. [...] Based on real-time, high-precision digital analyses of your anal sphincter muscle contraction patterns, the robot projects video and sound footage of the human anal canal and intestines onto the outside of your body and your living environment. [...]

The fact that he could only control his smart technologies with his fingers and voice meant that he experienced an increasing alienation from his body, its inconsistencies and excretions.

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8 Responses:

  1. Bob says:

    Needs more blockchain.

    And I am perfectly satisfied with how my sphincter currently is integrated in everyday living.

  2. Waider says:

    “Did I ever tell you about the man who taught his asshole to talk fully integrate into everyday living?”

  3. Mark Simpson says:

    Ah... finally got my Emacs setup just the way I want...

  4. Richard says:

    Smart Pipe Inc. is a registered sex offender [I bet I missed a "previously".]

  5. Aracan says:

    I do love this. I also love the fact that I misread "There will be live demonstrations during the fart fair."

  6. Elusis says:

    I hate you, Milkman Jamie.

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