Home Cooking Is Killing Restaurants

Previously, previously.

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DNA Lounge: Wherein our oven has a tantrum.

The pizza oven had been being a pain in the ass for a while because (it seemed) that the "light the pilot light" button was gummed up, and this cause the oven to occasionally revert back to the low-gas-flow mode used for lighting the pilot, meaning it would suddenly stop being hot enough. Since it holds heat for a long time, this exhibited itself as someone noticing halfway through the night, "Hey, why aren't the pies cooking like they used to?" We had a repair guy come look at it and several times he jiggled the button and said, "There, I fixed it." When we said "that's not a fix" he rolled his eyes and said, "Whatever loser, I'll be back in a few weeks maybe."

And then some time later, it seemed like the thermostat broke, causing it to be on full blast unless we turned it off entirely. So that was fun. So we got a different tech out here, and saw this:

Apparently one of the burners had cracked and was venting more flame than it should have been, which melted a hole through the bottom deck of the oven.

This injury cannot be new, but none of the repair techs we've had through here over the last few years noticed it. Apparently you can't even see these parts of the oven unless you've disassembled half of the thing first. It's a huge amount of work. It's all sealed up and enclosed, you can't just pop off the front panel and peek in.

You're probably thinking, "Wow, you should have been maintaining and inspecting this thing better," and you're right. But I assure you, when we bought this oven brand new in 2015 we asked the manufacturer, "What's the maintenance schedule on this thing?" and they unambiguously said, "Oh, change the stones every couple of years, that's it."

So that's awesome. Maybe their official maintenance program is "wait for it to turn into a geyser of molten steel and fiberglass then buy a new one."

It's mostly fixed now. Some parts have been replaced, and a few more are on order.

We've also been having a slow-motion plumbing nightmare in the DNA Pizza toilet drains because apparently our customers are in the habit of taking great heaping fistfuls of paper towels and flushing them down the toilets. This does not end well. I can't even fathom what they're doing in there. The paper towel dispensers aren't even near the toilets. Why would you grab a hundred paper towels and take them into the stall with you, and whatever it is you're doing, wouldn't toilet paper chafe less? Nevermind, I don't want to know.

So we got some new paper towel dispensers that are the kind where you pull down the handle to get one sheet, instea of the tri-fold "grab a ream or two" variety. Maybe this will help? At least it will slow them down.

Also, "Someone took another of our soap dispenser tops as a trophy" is a thing I have to say on the regular. Whyyyy. Do you put it on the shelf with your empty Budweiser bottles? Punch it in bro.


"...and I'm all out of mistletoe."

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Blade Runner Day

Today is Blade Runner Day, meaning you all now finally have permission to start dressing fashionably.

You may have seen people making "Blade Runner Day" posts on November 1, but those people are Wrong. Blade Runner occurs between Nov 19 and Nov 22, 2019.

There are several shots in Blade Runner showing Decard reading a newspaper ("The Independent Sentinel", "Farming The Oceans, The Moon and Antarctica", "World Wide Computer Linkup Planned"), however the date on that paper is unreadable, and I've never found a clear photo of the original prop (and neither has Typeset in the Future). I even tried enhancing 34 to 36.

But! The execrable Blade Runner 2049 establishes that Deckard interviews Rachel on the 20th, just before that scene where the screenwriter turns two characters to face the camera and monologue his Lit Crit 101 podcast analysis of a scene from the earlier, better movie.

It was daytime during Rachel's interview. I figure Gaff picked Decard up on evening of the 19th, as he was eating dinner, so Holden presumably got aired out earlier that same day. Deckard kills Zhora and Rachel kills Leon on the evening of the 20th while Pris is scamming JF. Roy shows up at JF's for breakfast on the 21st. Later that evening Roy kills Tyrell and JF, and Deckard returns to the Bradbury to witness Roy's death early on the morning on the 22nd (as per the Workprint voiceover).

So you can start dressing like this now, but FFS, please smoke less:

And as long as we're here, thinking about how Blade Runner endures as one of the greatest movies of all time, let me refer you back to my hit-piece on Blade Runner 2049. That movie is very, very bad, and I'm still proud of my post about it.

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Softbody Tetris

This is soothing to watch, right up until one's realization that completed rows don't liquify, at which point it becomes intolerable.

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Manic Pixie Green Girl

Also, pro tip: "You can't put liquid bandage on and take it off with acetone for six days, or you have no skin and no liver."

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"Who among us hasn't dismembered someone with a bone saw?"

This monstrous piece of shit.
Uber CEO Dara Khosrowshahi on Saudi Arabia's assassination of Jamal Khashoggi:

I think that government said that they made a mistake. It's a serious mistake. We've made mistakes too, right, with self-driving ... So I think that people make mistakes. It doesn't mean that they can never be forgiven.

For those not keeping track:

  • The CIA concluded that Saudi Prince Mohammed bin Salman personally ordered the murder of Khashoggi. He was dismembered with a bone saw while still alive, beheaded, and had his fingers cut off within minutes of walking into a Saudi embassy.

  • The Saudi government owns more than 10% of Uber, at over $3.5 billion of investment.

  • Even after Prince Bonesaw personally ordered the murder of a journalist, Uber founder and billionaire sociopath Travis Kalanick (who still owns 8.5% of Uber, after being fired as CEO) took another $400 million from the Saudis for some other bullshit gig-economy con-job where now he's trying to dismember the restaurant industry and sell off the parts.

If you ever, ever give money to Uber -- what is wrong with you? What would it take?

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DNA Lounge: Wherein Facebook continues the war against its own customers.

We have had a band coming up next Tuesday called Chastity, and....

You say rejected ad, I say emergent new flyer design.

Previously, previously.


Donkey Kong

Donkey Kong is the story of a bar owner being tormented by a plumber.

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ICE and complicity

ICE rolled an armored military vehicle. with a gunner in the roof. through an immigrant community in Queens.

ICE dropped an estimated $5 million on 16 of these military vehicles as an "operational necessity for officer safety."

Sophie Haskins: Why I Quit GitHub:

"What am I trying to accomplish by quitting? Am I quitting because I believe it will have some impact on ICE itself, on GitHub's contract with ICE? How will it compare to what I think I can do if I stay and organize from within?"

For me, the answer to the latter question is: I don't know. I don't know if quitting has more impact on stopping these things. Folks are still working hard to make changes from the inside, and I didn't know that quitting going to have more impact than if I were to stay and fight with them.; I realized the impact wasn't my goal -- I wanted to quit because it's unethical to participate in crimes against humanity. I was choosing based on what I can stomach. Even if someone had advised me, "it wouldn't help to quit," I still would have done it. I don't want to be part of a company that contracts with ICE. [...]

For those considering quitting their tech job, you should examine how your company contributes to these things: who you sell technology to, how tech isn't neutral, how that non-neutrality works. If you're working with image (facial) recognition, that's literally a weapon.


People criticize tech companies for putting money above principle, but Github is holding on to a $100K ICE contract despite employee anger, and Facebook says it will continue to sell toxic political ads that are 0.5% of revenue. These are clear examples of putting principle first.

The problem is that employees and journalists have trouble accepting what principles the companies hold. Big tech is not lying about this -- look at their political giving, their tax avoidance, their senior hires, their boards, their products -- but there's a fair amount of denial.

If I sponsored CPAC, evaded taxes, had dinner with Trump, gave Ivanka an Internet freedom award, donated to Mitch McConnell, appeared on Sean Hannity's radio show to defend Alex Jones, and had frequent off-the-record meetings with Republican figures, you would say I'm right-wing.

You would also say this if I had Peter Thiel on my board, hired a former Bush administration official and the public mouthpiece of Trump's family detention program to run my office of public policy, or operated a massive for-profit video recruitment network for white supremacy.

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