"I'm the Googlebot! I'm here to index you! Please hold completely still!"

I Tried to Watch a Video of a Puppy and Accidentally Sent Every Photo I've Ever Taken to Google:

In our brief time on this rock, even the best of us are likely to own ourselves from time to time. As some of my colleagues would be happy to tell you, I own myself more often than most, most recently because I wanted to see a video of my friend's new puppy.

I recently went to a concert, had a few beers, and woke up with a hangover and a notification that my phone had successfully uploaded 15,000 images and videos to Google Photos. Here's what happened.

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jwz mixtape 194

Please enjoy jwz mixtape 194.

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Current Music: as noted

DNA Lounge: Wherein a winnar is us.

SF Weekly's Best of SF is out, and once again, DNA Lounge was voted "Best Dance Club"! Hooray! Go team!

Also of note, "Best New Club" went to Hotline, last here on March 30. That award is a little awkward, because while we had been doing it quarterly-ish, there's not currently another Hotline event coming up any time soon... schedules are conspiring against us for a while. Maybe later in the year?

I always wonder how snide I'm allowed to be when talking about a popularity contest that we won, but let me just say that my big takeaway from the "Editor's Picks" this year is that we now live in a city where you can go somewhere and pay a "Bong Steward" to wipe off your bong for you. So that's where we are now. As a society.

So here's something funny that has happened twice now, by which I mean not funny at all. We have a urinal in one of the restrooms in the club that is feeling less than fresh. Twice now, a plumber has walked into the pizza place, and asked "Where's the bathroom?" They quite sensibly point random-dude at the restaurant's bathroom, where he proceeds to "fix" the non-broken urinal in there. If our plumbers would tell us the time, or even the day, that they are planning to show up we could do a better job of intercepting them with someone who actually knew what's going on, but ha ha ha ha that's just not how plumbing is done, Son.

"The DNA Lounge Story: Mostly Plumbers and Permits."

Anyhow, please enjoy jwz mixtape 194. and some photos of recent events.

May The Fourth Be With You
Back 2 Bassic: Blvk Sheep
Spring Fest
Cocktail Robotics Hackathon

Monday Hubba
Riddim Hours: Lumberjvck
So Stoked + Peelander-Z
Hubba Hubba: Cartoon Funhouse

Because we are in the Stupidest Timeline, this was the plot of Charlie's Angels.

Cops Can Find the Location of Any Phone in the Country in Seconds, and a Senator Wants to Know Why:

"I am writing to insist that AT&T take proactive steps to prevent the unrestricted disclosure and potential abuse of private customer data, including real-time location information, by at least one other company to the government," a May 8 letter sent from Wyden to the President and Chief Executive Officer of AT&T reads. [...]

In his letter to AT&T, which has similar text to letters sent to other carriers, Wyden writes that this check amounts of "nothing more than the legal equivalent of a pinky promise."

"The fact that Securus provides this service at all suggests that AT&T does not sufficiently control access to your customers' private information," the letter adds.

In Shocking Drop of Second Shoe:

Hacker Breaches Securus, the Company That Helps Cops Track Phones Across the US:

Most of the users in the spreadsheet are from US government bodies, including sheriff departments, local counties, and city law enforcement. Impacted cities include Minneapolis, Phoenix, Indianapolis, and many others. The data also includes Securus staff members, as well as users with personal email addresses that aren't explicitly linked to a particular government department. [...]

"Location aggregators are -- from the point of view of adversarial intelligence agencies -- one of the juiciest hacking targets imaginable," Thomas Rid, a professor of strategic studies at Johns Hopkins University, told Motherboard in an online chat. [...]

"Track mobile devices even when GPS is turned off," the Securus website reads. "Call detail records providing call origination and call termination geo-location data," it adds.

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Kansas cops can't have sex during traffic stops

The new law bans sexual relations "during the course of a traffic stop, a custodial interrogation, an interview in connection with an investigation, or while the law enforcement officer has such person detained."

Kansas was one of 33 states where consensual sex between police and people in their custody wasn't a crime.

That came as a surprise to members of the House Judiciary Committee, who got the new law passed in a bundled bill with several other law-enforcement measures. Gov. Jeff Colyer signed it into law Thursday.

She said it spun off the case of Lamonte McIntyre, a Kansas City, Kan., man released last year after spending 23 years in prison for a double murder he didn't commit.

The investigation in that case led to multiple affidavits alleging that the detective who made the arrest, Roger Golubski, had a long history of coercing sex from women in Kansas City's black community by threatening to arrest them or their relatives if they didn't comply.

Holscher said she was also moved by a case in New York where a teenager claimed she had been raped by two police officers in the back of their van, but no charges were filed because the officers claimed the sex was consensual and therefore legal.

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Timeless just wrapped up its 2nd season, and it is a great show. You should watch it! It hasn't yet been picked up for a 3rd season, and I hope that it is.

But that's not going to stop me from making fun of their computer displays, because come on you guys, it's not hard to do latitude and longitude correctly -- it's right there on your phone...

That first one is supposed to be "San Francisco, today" (which probably means "early 2017", and somewhere in The Presidio or Marin). So first of all, I think it's a safe bet that if there's a season 3, they're going to 1934 Argentina. Or at least there's a post-it note on the writers' room wall that says that. But, the coordinates are wrong! +41.881412, -87.71697 is in the middle of Chicago. If you flip the sign on the latitude it's closer to Argentina, but still about a thousand miles out in the Pacific. (I do appreciate the overlay window running xmatrix, though.)

The second one is actually supposed to be 1888 San Francisco (and why doesn't that one display the day and month?) but the coordinates are differently wrong. +38.881010,-57.75649 is over a thousand miles out into the Atlantic. Flip the sign on the latitude and... we're back in Argentina!

Now maybe after all their mucking about with history, the current Timeless universe measures latitude and longitude in different units, or has a different prime meridian or something, but I don't see a coordinate system that makes both the Argentina and San Francisco points line up. They're not off by a consistent amount or even in the same direction.

Bad illustrator, no time machine for you!

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Mac Mini Mid 2010 Hard Drive Replacement, "Honest Trailers" version.

You can probably get this torx screw with a small flat-head screwdriver. Be sure to swear in the direction of Cupertino while doing so.
These two are probably stripped already somehow. Just grab the fan at the corner and pull up until the screw tabs snap off. Once you've done that, you can unscrew them by hand.

You won't be able to get this one out. Snap that too.
There's no way you're getting this fucker plugged back in so stop fantasizing about it.

Just throw this part away. Bluetooth is stupid and ethernet is less of a pain in the ass than wifi.
You'll have to wiggle the drive like a motherfucker but it will come out eventually. Some of those extra wires on the side are probably going to break but they don't matter.
To hold the drive in place: duct tape.

To hold the fan in place: some more duct tape.

The screw-hatch doesn't close tightly any more? You guessed it.

Oh yeah, make sure the fan is actually turning. Turn it right-side-up and shake it after taping things, then check again. That's what we call "quality assurance", that is.


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Some dragons just want to watch the world burn. Wait. That's all dragons.

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The Metro Gun Share Program

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