Wealthy Bristol residents cause uproar by installing 'anti-bird spikes' to stop droppings hitting expensive carsOne resident, who asked to remain anonymous, confirmed the spikes were "solely to to protect cars", which include a number of expensive BMWs and Audis, from bird droppings.
They said: "The spikes are solely to protect the cars, there is no other reason.
"There is a big problem with bird droppings around here. They can really make a mess of cars, and for some reason the birds do seem to congregate around this area."
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Vandals. If they care so much about their precious cars, why the fuck are they parking them under trees? Rent a garage, and if it's not important enough to do that, it's certainly not important enough to deprive city birds of their natural habitat.
New product idea: Anti-asshole spikes. Place them in Starbucks, along rich shopping districts, and around coke dealers.
How about anti-one-percent spikes?
How about stealth spikes that pop up after the one-percenter parks.
Imagine those spikes on the parking spaces...
Incidentially, caltrops are also known as crow's feet.
How nice of them to provide the hardware!
Wait, how did I not realise that this is in Bristol until now?
BRB, just got to dig out a catapult and bag of bread crumbs. Unless anyone knows a food which will attract geese? Goose shite is messy...
It would be pretty bad if the geese injured themselves while trying to grab breadcrumbs. I like how you're thinking but this is not going in the right direction...
I was planning on putting the breadcrumbs directly on the cars, I don't want the birds to be hurt.