Hooray, I can't even restore my iPhone

Something has again gotten corrupted in the iPhone music database, so I keep getting:

even though:

Which is amazing design: "Because I somehow think that all of the music won't fit, I will sync none of it. You're welcome."

So I just want to nuke it from orbit and re-install from local backup, and wait 5 hours for all the music to re-sync. But when I try to do "Restore iPhone" I get:

And if I put the phone into "Recovery" mode (hold down power+home for 30+ seconds), I get:

Latest iTunes, latest MacOS, latest iOS. Double-you tee fuck, Apple.

The only effect of doing a mere "Restore Backup" is that it blows away all my saved passwords. Thanks again for that feature, dicks. What year is this? Apple thinks that sane people store their password vault inside their heads?

Update: And after all this wheel-spinning, now "Autoimporter" won't launch when I plug in the phone; and it seems like every other time I plug the phone in, it tries to re-sync 5000+ tracks, and then says it failed to sync 4000+ of them. Also, the act of syncing makes iTunes on the desktop just stop playing at random times, because apparently copying files out the USB port and playing music at the same time is too confusing for it.

Previously, previously, previously.

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