Sovereign Furry Citizens

Free Furry of The Land:

The thing that got me wasn't the "furry" aspect, but the Sovereign Citizen aspect of the whole thing, once again proving that some people have insanity so strong it can bleed right the fuck through a fursuit. [...]

Alright, so, every lawyer in the world that clicked on that probably got to this part: [...] and saw the strange bolding, the weird capitalization of certain letters, and the words "potentially damaging criminal activities causing substantial commercial injury damages" and went "OH SHIT! IT'S SOV CIT TIME!" Indeed. Indeed it fucking is.

Alright, so SovCit is legal jargon for "sovereign citizens," a movement which believes that they can operate outside of and, in some cases, in a superior position to the law. While every goddamn lawyer in the world is aware of these batshit battlers, [...] the rule of thumb (heh, see what I did there?) when dealing with a Sovereign Citizen is to recognize that you're in for either a very good or very bad ride, depending on the particular brand of craziness they espouse. [...]

Second, those seven points are probably complete bullshit. "Incite to riot?" "Trespass on contract Obligations?" Does "incite to riot" even get charged anymore? And seriously, could you imagine this riot in the mind's eye of the writer of that letter? Just people in badger suits yanking out gats and opening fire on each other.

Is that "riot" or "hunting" at that point? Is it okay if they have a license and stick to the bag limit? These are questions left unanswered by the letter. [...]

But here's the real takeaway:

3. Furry Sovereign Citizens do not insist that their fursonas are their actually identities, which bums me out as I was really looking forward to seeing "BOOMER THE DOG, A FREE DOG OF THE LAND" on a legal pleading at some point.

5. This shit is better when you know the guy writing it has, at some point, jerked off to a picture of two animals fucking.

Also, Nazi Furries are totally a thing because of course they are.

Though whether they are "ha ha only trolling" Nazis or Actual Fucking Nazis is unclear (both of which are equally punchable,BTW.)

"It's obviously not a swastika," claims Foxler. [...] "I didn't take any consideration because of my lack of World War Two knowledge," he says. "I don't think I could ever take it off at this point, it's so ingrained into my character, my fursona."

Previously, previously, previously.

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6 Responses:

  1. Nick H says:

    At this point, I think someone figured out how to accelerate the heat death of the universe by ushering in accelerating chaos.

  2. I believe Rob Zombie's Werewolf Women of the SS Tarantinoesque trailer requires an honorable mention.

  3. Aaron says:

    I seriously, unironically want to see a Nazi fursuit march before I die. Like a bizarro world reprise of the Klan rally that went through my town when I was a kid, homemade costumes and all.