Church Can Start Its Own Police Force, Alabama Senate SaysA large church in Alabama is one step closer to creating its own police force, a move that seems to be without precedent in the U.S. The state's Senate has approved legislation that would give church police officers the same powers other law enforcement officers have in Alabama. [...]
Both chambers' legislation specifically names Briarwood Presbyterian Church, a Birmingham megachurch that "says it needs its own police officers to keep its school as well as its more than 4,000 person congregation safe," Alabama Public Radio reports. [...]
Earlier this month, Alabama's House adopted the Alabama Church Protection Act, which would help religious groups form armed security patrols. It authorizes "any church or place of worship to establish a security program by which designated members are authorized to carry firearms for the protection of the congregation of the church or place of worship." The act also provides "limited immunity for members of such a program when they're acting within their duties.
Needs such as...? Are the current security guards unarmed or something?
I think their pressing need must be "immunity from prosecution".
Snow Crash here we come.
And this time, the Mafia haven't even got a Deliverator for us!
OMG, I just realized that Uber Rush is CosaNostra Pizza. Damn you, Stephenson.
That is a mildly terrifying concept in itself. I miss uncle Sam's Army suppliers.
But yeah Snow Crash is a future more likely than not in my worldview.
Shiawase Decision here we come!
This is not one of the better SCP articles.
Perhaps not (I like this one). It is nevertheless the basis of corporations getting extraterritoriality so still pretty interesting.
Presumably like many ridiculous bills passed by the Alabama legislature, this will be quickly ruled unconstitutional by the courts and left derelict on the side of the road.
But...
If it somehow survives scrutiny at the state level, I cannot wait for the mad geniuses at the Church of Satan to get their hands on this one.
Next up: BART decides to legitimize their "police" force by forming a religion.
Corbettite Transportists? A la Girl Genius?
It goes a little something like <a href=http://www.lyricsfreak.com/c/cake/comfort+eagle_20026636.htmlthis.
So I'm guessing when a local mosque takes up arms these southerners will be equally supportive...?
I'm making the presumption that there's at least one mosque Alabama.
If This Goes On—, here we come!
It is well known that their school has a drug problem, and they want their own police force to be able to cover it up and keep it out of the press. That's the basic reasons for the bill.
No doubt the proponents of bill point at the Charleston church shooting as justification. Because there's nothing like turning a recent tragedy into a reason to bring more lethal weapons into public life.