Congratulations on your upgrade to Malebolge, the Eighth Circle of the Abyss. This tier of our eternal rewards program is reserved for customers of our Fraud department, including flatterers, adulterers, hypocrites, and thieves. And what a dedicated customer you have been.
We thank you for your use of our offerings, including Graft, Pandering, Deceit, and the Promotion of Discord. You earned your Fraud points through a surprising variety of purchases, ranging from tax evasion to promoting white supremacy. [...]
While Malebolge is one of our highest membership tiers, there is one higher. If you fulfill certain requirements, we would be delighted to upgrade you to Cocytus, the Ninth Circle. This lake of ice is reserved for our most honored guests, the traitors. While policy prevents us from suggesting specific qualifying products in our Betrayal line, we are confident you will explore your options.
Also, if you arrived late and missed the trailers before the movie, these are what I put together this time. A couple people asked me, "Are all of those movies real?" Yes. Yes they are.
So then this happened:
Go ahead and get those "Hacking the Gibson" jokes out of your system now. I found this even more unsettling than the fact that these days I get most of my morning updates on Trump's march toward the looming cyberpunk dystopia from this gentleman's RTs.
Photos will be forthcoming, but in the meantime, here's what our head-to-head Wipeout XL rig looked like with the elusive PS1 link cable: