Saying he was trying not to think about how awful the next few days would be, master ayahuasca shaman Piero Salazar expressed his sense of dread Tuesday as he confirmed his week would once again be spent guiding American tech CEOs to spiritual oneness. [...]
"These days, I can't even look at my calendar without cringing -- it's pretty much all tech execs," said Salazar, adding that he had thought the developed world's interest in the ayahuasca tea ceremony was generally a positive until it became his full-time job to provide celestial guidance to Bay Area venture capitalists and app founders who had learned about the practice through a Viceland special. "I believe this source of healing should be available to everyone, but lately it seems like the people I guide toward a vision of cosmic wholeness are all 32-year-old billionaires hoping to gain a deeper insight into their SEO strategy or whatever."
Ayahuasca Shaman Dreading Another Week Of Guiding Tech CEOs To Spiritual Oneness
How close is his parking space?
Hah! Missed the Onion logo at first. It was even funnier that way.