"What if powerful and intimidating Bar Rescue host Jon Taffer interrupted anime demons having cybersex on Twitter?"

Anime cybersex roleplay consists of people pretending to be anime characters, often with supernatural powers, and acting out explicit sex scenarios on Twitter. The worlds of anime cybersex roleplay and Bar Rescue are rarely combined.

@FEAR_REBORN He watches as the city slowly destroys itself, neighbor turning on neighbor, brother on sister, chaos
@JonTafferRP He'd be better off watching this freakin' bar. You know that table in the corner has been waiting 45 minutes for their nachos?
@FEAR_REBORN And he's waited years to be free
@JonTafferRP I don't embrace excuses - I embrace solutions. What do YOU think needs to be done to save this bar?
@FEAR_REBORN it should be burned along with all of it's memories and dumpster children who were born too early to be wanted
@JonTafferRP Shame, too. The demographics in the neighborhood screamed for the nightlife only that bar could provide.
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4 Responses:

  1. James says:

    I am a huge fan of Jon Taffer's relentless quest for superior customer service and reasonable responses to consumer demand. So why does typing that make me feel dead inside?

    • jwz says:

      That show is terrible.

      The moral of every episode is, "all problems can be solved by throwing money at them, so don't think too hard about the fact that if the product-placement-heavy TV show wasn't here to throw the money around, this business would be fucked." Oh, it happens in a fantasy land where permits are never required for anything.

      "My friend the contractor came in and built this brand new bar over the weekend." Oh really.

      "Since there's a restaurant next door, we decided to knock a window in this connecting wall and let them sell through it to our bar customers." Oh really.

      At least Kitchen Nightmares was mostly about hygiene.

    • nooj says:

      Also they heavily manipulate the before/after shoots to provoke a bad experience before the "rescue" and a good one after. The service is manipulated, and the video is manipulated. Fake customers are sent in to harass the staff, and the few deservedly negative reactions are pulled out of context and relentlessly replayed.

      You're watching a fantasy TV show where bars aren't chosen by their need for improvement, but by which owners agreed to have their bars manhandled and publicly humiliated.

      The two bars "rescued" in Austin were turned into disasters. One immediately reverted to its former name, and the other finished out its contract before closing to wash off the stink.

      • James says:

        That settles it then, we must produce a Jon Taffer critique of his own show, or we consign culture to terrible bars.