Never before did someone die while farting. Farts. So smooth. Always going like faaaaaaaarrrrrt, like I'm on a great winged being of the distant future. The beautiful smell pervading the air like I'll never need Febreeze again. Pizzas and mayonnaise bringing about destruction in my only liver...impending gastronomic doom. We like fantasy novels. The Last Jack Daniels. Ketchup Plains, vast and unthinkable. Endless dirge of McDonald's snacks floating about like a sea of nuclear waste.
First photo: Wow, pregnant girl with microphone on stage giving it all she's got!
Second photo: Nope, not pregnant.
Third photo: But sometimes things, they happen.
Fourth photo: Soon, perhaps.