Mormon Flow Chart for Your Soul
Seems like there's a lot of confusion lately over what Mormons actually believe. If you are a befuddled believer or heathen, here's a handy chart to help you out. This guide can help you track the progress of your soul from its disembodied birth in heaven to its final resting place in one of the four houses of the afterlife. Come to think of it, perhaps this would make a good board game...
...and the footnotes.
MaP Testing Protocol
Paste extrusion into 350 gram segments.
"Toilet model maximum performance (MaP) level is identified as the maximum media loading (in discrete increments expressed in grams) at which toilet model successfully clears all media from fixture in at least four of five attempts. [...] Test specimens may contain small volumes of air, however, specimens that float shall not be used."
