DOB: 2/16/1971
Occupation: Industrialist
Insurance: Self-pay
Orthopedic: By far the greatest contributor to patient's ongoing morbidity are his multiple and seemingly ceaseless musculoskeletal injuries. The most significant of these was sustained several years ago, when he was rushed to GCGH with several fractures of his lumbar vertebrae, reportedly after falling while rappelling. Skeletal series obtained at that time revealed numerous (>20) areas of orthopedic injury in various states of healing, which could not be fully explained by recent fall, including areas of all extremities and many ribs; confirmatory bone scan similarly showed many areas of increased uptake. Patient's robust stature is not consistent with osteogenesis imperfecta, and skin biopsy was negative for abnormal collagen and P3H1 or CRTAP genetic defects. Malignancy was suspected, but eventually ruled out following oncology consultation. Patient explained most of these (and most subsequent) injuries as being the result of membership in a private and apparently quite intense mixed martial arts club. Patient has denied being the victim of domestic abuse by Mr. Grayson following indirect and direct questioning on numerous occasions.
Law and the Multiverse also weighs in.
Everybody lies.
Some googling reveals that House/Batman slash is, in fact, a thing that exists.
Not sure if I should say "oh god" or "specify type of goat".
The part where he sends his residents to break into Wayne Manor to look for more leads should be interesting.
That is a forgery based on pure speculation. The simple fact of the matter is that Mr. Wayne has enjoyed an uninterrupted and long period of excellent health - to which state of affairs several boards of directors can attest. I read (sorry, lost the link) a press release on monday in which he was forthcoming about the fact that he often seeks routine medical care for a man his age from some very private and elite physicians, including several offshore -- but as he reasonably explained this is precisely because conventional domestic medical care providers are unable to protect the privacy of a man of his stature. The medical records leaked here are certainly a forgery for the simple reason that no such records can exist, for Mr. Wayne has never sought or received treatment from these people. Indeed, in this forgery, you can see that not only does the conventional system fail to protect his privacy but it will even make stuff up if he won't cooperate.
Next week after arrangements are finalized Mr. Wayne will release key excerpts of his authentic medical records as they are maintained by his personal physicians in Switzerland and Denmark. These will include many X-ray images that lay to rest rumors of "(> 20) orthopedic injuries."
These forgeries are particularly nefarious and targeted because, as far as Wayne's organizations can determine, some of the physicians involved may have at one time believed that they actually provided service to Mr. Wayne when, in fact, they have never met. Wayne Enterprises is working with these doctors in an attempt to identify and prosecute whatever Bruce Wayne impersonator obtained treatment under a false identity.
*slow clap*
Gotham Private Academy
Motto: Ut at purus Eton et Harrow
Dear Mr Wayne,
I am alarmed by the physical condition of your ward, Richard Grayson. He is covered from head to toe in cuts and bruises and his arms are marked by what can only be rope bruises.
When asked about this, he would only say that the two of you 'got into some rough stuff last night'.
I feel it is only fair to warn you that I have every intention of bringing Richard's case to the attention of the appropriate authorities immediately.
Yours Sincerely,
squiggle
Principal
(Adapted from How to be a Superhero by Leigh and Lepine)