Playing Pool with a Robot, which is totally not a euphemism
Needs to be faster, though. Like that pancake picker. Also it should have a fedora, a cigar, and be playing Bad to the Bone in a loop.
May I recommend that robotics researchers not do their own voiceovers? This is like "a face made for radio" but different.
Wet Hole APM 08279+5255.

Two teams of astronomers have discovered the largest and farthest reservoir of water ever found in the universe. It's 12 billion light years away, and holds at least 140 trillion times the amount of water in all the Earth's oceans combined.
It manifests itself as a colossal mass of water vapor, hidden in the distant APM 08279+5255 quasar. Quasars are bright and violent galactic nuclei fueled by a supermassive black hole at their center.
This quasar holds a black hole that's 20 billion times more massive than the sun, and after gobbling down dust and gas it belches out as much energy as a thousand trillion suns. The water vapor is spread around the black hole in a gaseous region spanning hundreds of light years.