No, really:The SuicideGirls Bring Unique "Lifestyle Brand" to Comics:
Now a full service entertainment company, SuicideGirls have produced a series of longform documentaries that have topped ratings charts on cable TV, and have been featured in numerous TV show and specials (including CSI: NY). The company's fourth feature film is currently airing on cable television. Additionally, they have a clothing line, a magazine, an iPhone app and now an upcoming comic book.
My mind reels at how bad this will be, even within the set of "really horrible ideas for comic books", which is not a small set.
I honestly don't think it's possible for a comic to capture the Unique Experience of this Lifestyle Brand. I did watch a little bit of the car-crash that was their "documentary" when it was on TV, and I believe that no comic book will be able to adequately re-create the experience of watching a bunch of badly-tattooed shrieking harpies fighting over a bottle of whiskey.
Can you imagine trying to describe, using only text and pictures, the pain of hearing Chloe Webb's continuous squeals of "Sid! Siiiiiid!" in Sid and Nancy? Or any line of Courtney Love's dialog in Straight to Hell? You can't successfully commit chalkboard-nails like that to paper.
This is what a Suicide Girls comic would have looked like in 1990 (Peter Bagge's Hate, #2). This picture is only slightly dated! See if you can spot the anachronisms!
If he'd somehow had the foresight not to put knobs on a slightly wider TV, this picture might not have aged a day.
Heh, Peter lives across the street from me. I shall convey your respects! (or... whatever they were)
I certainly didn't mean to tarnish the good name of Peter Bagge with the Suicide Girls association. I had to dig out that copy of Hate from my boxes to scan that! I hadn't looked at that comic in many years, but that image popped immediately into my mind and had to be found.
From your personal copy no less! Heh, flatterer.
The only image in my mind was of some poor bastard copy writer hunched over a keyboard, grinding their teeth with shame as they wrote it. I think everyone involved has burnt out a little bit of their soul putting this together:
"Yeah, Dave, at the staff meeting we decided you get the short straw this month - you have to write about the Suicide Girls comic. And remember - be enthusiastic about it."
You can't successfully commit chalkboard-nails like that to paper.
You might be able to successfully reproduce the follow-up headache though, by rendering every other panel as a magic eye-type image where the alignment is ever-so-slight off.
but Wikipedia demonstrates an enclopedic entry.
Oh, the edit war over the watermark is a nice touch.
Wikipedia: Internet Performance Art.
The tattooed quote from T. S. Eliot's Wasteland prompted sundry thoughts, including 'one-eyed merchant? hohoho. decayed hole among the mountains? hohoho.'
Comments like this make me wish every blog had an upvote button.
On reflection, the one-page ad where the Suicide Girls save the day with the help of Hostess Twinkies might be a good place to set the bar for Peak Kitsch.
I don't think 'anachronisms' means what you think it means.
The VCR, tapes and 4:3 TV with dials are of the time (1990s) but they are not anachronisms for then.
Way to miss the joke, dude.
I don't think 'joke' means what you think it means...
I am saddened by how much her VHS collection is like my MPG collection. Although in my defense I have refrained from showing most of them at your club. I wonder how DG would react to Lucifer Rising.
I love Chloe Webb more than my next breath. And whatever happened to Lloyd's geek t-shirt website? Sorry for going off topic!