Remember the crazy guy who claims he has specially bred giant Japanese crab lice that don't bite? And that they make great pets? ("Like Sea Monkeys in Your Pants!")
oh interweb. you are truly a cornucopia
"I have pubic lice in my mailbox":
Current Music: Louie Fontaine -- Evil Force in my Pants ♬
Seriously, WTF is WRONG with people?
Even if there were lice in the envelope, what are they supposed to live off if they can't bite? Do you have to dropper feed pig blood into your jockeys once a day?
i think the guy claimed they were feeding on dead skin cells.
With imagination, we kind of already have lice that feed off dead skin cells crawling all over our bodies.
ew. don't talk about it.
oh good god, that's fantastic!
and since trying to grow false nit eggs would probably turn out to be as effective as all my attempts to grow real sea monkeys (unless i managed to actually sprout the seeds and ended up with, oh say, a lovely pot of sweet basil) this has the makings of the best surprise gift EVER!
hmmmm.... who do i know with an upcoming birthday?
Now I need to start going to therapy again.