Exhibit A:
Microsoft Vista Speech Recognition Tested - Perl Scripting

Exhibit B:
W.C. Fields - Six of a Kind

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20 Responses:

  1. I am now telling the computer exactly what it can do with a life time supply of chocolate.

  2. edlang says:

    The speech recognition software is biased towards Lisp / Scheme? Not once did it get "open parenthesis" wrong!

  3. greatevil says:

    funny. but it would go better if he stopped saying "thank you" it is a fucking computer treat it like a cheep whore that it is, it needs no thanks.

  4. jarodrussell says:

    This is Daily Show worthy, because I haven't laughed this hard since last night's Daily Show. :)

  5. gngr says:

    Ahh, how much more efficient. They should have found a programmer who doesn't make a habit of talking to himself aloud. But then it wouldn't have been nearly as funny, of course. Thanks for that, it took me 45 minutes to get through it, the first two minutes of trying to type a capital i instead of just reaching over and typing the fucking letter had me just about falling out of my chair in laughter.

  6. lordshell says:

    I think I ruptured something laughing.

    The future is here, and it's an annoying motherfucker.

  7. "It looks like you're trying to write a computer program"

    • editer says:

      delete ruffle
      delete raffle
      delete ill delete rough
      press R
      press O
      press F
      press L

      (thanks to a friend of mine)

  8. 4zumanga says:

    The perl thing would have been funny if:

    a) it was half the length
    b) He wasn't clearly saying extra things just to mess things up
    c) He could talk properly
    d) I didn't try the same thing and have almost no problems. I still wouldn't want to write perl with it, but I didn't have any problems with getting it to do what I wanted.

    • kevinspencer says:

      Oh c'mon, it was a *little* funny. I don't think he was saying things just to mess it up. It appeared to be doing a fine job of that by itself.

      • 4zumanga says:

        I dunno, how many people talk loundly to their computers every time they do something wrong? I know if I did that at work, I'd start getting slapped after about 30 minutes :)

        • kevinspencer says:

          Considering the mistakes the speech "recognition" software was making I'm surprised the bloke was that reserved to be honest ;-)

          And speaking of getting slapped at work for talking out loud. Can you imagine working in an environment where *everyone* used the speech recognition software and talked to their computer all day. Holy Christ that would be annoying.

    • smackfu says:

      I'm a bit bewildered that it knows enough to not print "capital" when he said it (most of the time), but still refused to actually capitalize anything.

  9. ultranurd says:

    I'm sure it would have worked perfectly had he been coding in C#.NET.

  10. buz says:

    It's still an improvement on my tyoing skills.

    DANM! See?!

  11. edouardp says:

    The perl thing was pretty funny, although, obviously, the speech recognition is tuned for english and not perl. I'm sure you could make one that did perl really, really well, but it would really piss my mother off when she's writing to her cousin...

    But the WC Fields skit - that was hilarious! I think Physical Comedy has a bad rep, probably because there so much lousy material out there, but done well, like with the drunken pool cue operation above, it's sheer brilliance.

    • jwz says:

      W.C. Fields was awesome. I'm always amazed at how often I discover that my friends have no knowledge of this stuff; when I was a kid, those vaudevillian movies were on TV on Saturday afternoons right after Bugs Bunny, so by the age of 9 I'd probably seen everything ever made by W.C. Fields, Abbot and Costello, Laurel and Hardy, The Marx Bros... (and the Three Stooges, though I never liked them very much.)

      That pool cue skit is such a classic; it's up there with "Who's On First".

      • stickmaker says:

        Most physical comedians are remarkable athletes. Fields was an accomplished juggler before he turned to film acting, and it shows in several of his stunts.