Presumably this was meant to suggest that your super-awesomeness penetrated the thin fabric of the cubicle walls and hence enriched him with the emanations of your legendary programming power.
I can beat you there. Not only did Jamie respond to a newsgroup post of mine, but he SAVED IT AND YEARS LATER ">REPOSTED IT! That means he thought our INTERACTION WAS VALUABLE! Thus VALIDATING MY WORTH AS A HUMAN BEING!
I find that funny as I once posted a comment about Netscape's blink tag and jwz to a non-technical usenet group and got email from him explaining that he wasn't personally responsible for that one.
A couple of friends of mine claim to have known the guy who was personally responsible for the blink tag, before he moved to California to seek his fortune. He was actually proud of it, they say.
Pre-LJ, we had a rich email conversation (Me: "Hi! You don't know me! Come to our show!" JWZ: "Nope," pleasantly), in which you explained that you didn't like the Maritime Hall.
I know that is an opinion that you only share with your nearest and dearest.
As a result, I felt that we became much closer when I played at the MH and got electrocuted. It was clear that you were looking out for me, and trying to teach me a valuable lesson.
Post-LJ, I keep a carefully-folded picture of your dental cast in my wallet, so that I can try to recognize you on the street. I am not sure what the message is this time, but I can sense we are closer to being BFF. I am trying to leverage this connection into a better-paying job, so that I can afford to get a tattoo of the dental cast on the back of my hand, which will make it easier to recognize you.
Right now, I have to hold the picture in one hand, which leaves only one hand free to pry the person's mouth open so I can see their right-side molars.
Can you post your number here, in case they want to call my references? Or at least, a picture of the inside of the cast?
I would like to apply for the position of Chief Stalker. As you can see by my resume and police report, I have considerable background in stalking and exemplary skill in Being Near Famous People Without Them Knowing. I assure you that the collection of restraining orders I have is only a small subset of the many such operations I have, as you can tell from the collection of attached photographs and video clips.
Wow. I used the right-side-up version of that animated gif on My First Websiteâ„¢ in 9th grade, which was hideous and terrible to behold. I never thought I'd see any part of it again.
I once mentioned to a friend (social, but we'd previously worked in the same place) that I'd been cube neighbours with Dave Raggett.
He then admitted he'd snaffled Raggett's wastepaper bin and still kept it as a souvenir. Just think of all the tags that must have been consigned to that...
(Does anyone even remember Netscape and the 3.0 wars?)
Ah, Netscape. It all feels so golden glowey now. We used to hang on Netscape's every release, maxing out the office connection. Fer crissakes, I remember eagerly running netscape 0.x whatever it was.
I remember the Netscape webcam that screened the words we typed in. The Netscape office, what we could see of it, seemed a veritable palace wherein the future frothed, I kid you not! If JWZ had a cubicle, and it seemed unlikely, then it would have been gold-lined and fleecy. We were such bloody fan-boys, but hey I enjoyed it while the fun lasted. Netscape were leading us to the promised land and I wrote my first Perl CGI script. 15 years later, I'm still writing scripts. Ummm. I suppose it beats self-flagellation.
I started out in 1991 on the CERN command line bowser, which SUCKED. I think the next one I used was NCSA Mosaic. I jumped from that to Netscape in the 0.x releases. I even purchased Netscape Gold 1.22, and I still have it. ;-)
I started out in 1991 on the CERN command line bowser [...] the next one I used was NCSA Mosaic
Oh, you missed the fun of the interim ones.. like viola, and ... hmm, I've finally forgotten the others. For the early, pre-NCSA years of the web, all the browsers other than the line mode one would compile only if you had a machine identical to the author's.
I think the best feature of Mosaic was that you actually stood a chance of being able to run it on your platform.
(FWIW, the line mode browser ran on just about everything, including VMS and VM/CMS (both big at CERN at the time), and even if you had a printing terminal. It was like ed(1) or vi(1)-- it might not be fun to use, but at least it'd be there and work.)
Oh, I played with some others - those were my main browsers. lynx, links, and now elinks on the commnd line. Spyglass Mosaic, and others. You can walk down memory lane here: http://browsers.evolt.org/
Now you make a resume, and put down that this guy had a cubicle near you. Then he'll put down on his resume that you put down on your resume that he had a cubicle near you.
I got to actually *see* his cubicle at a job *before* netscape, not to mention the actual netscape cubicle. I also had an accidental elevator ride with a netscape founder during which, what the two of us being alone in there and all, was clearly my golden opportunity to make my pitch for something or other. And that's why, today, I'm rich and famous.
JWZ is the person from my profession / time who I most envy and would least want to be. Well, not really, but it sounds catchy, doesn't it?
Can I have some money, now?
-t
Comments are closed because this post is 16 years old.
I'm totally puttin' it on my resume that, a month or so ago, I was within twenty blocks of your bar.
You went to macworld too? I got directions to the bar when I went, but I couldn't bring myself to actually visit.
Presumably this was meant to suggest that your super-awesomeness penetrated the thin fabric of the cubicle walls and hence enriched him with the emanations of your legendary programming power.
"Yes, my legendary programming power always smells like that, what of it?"
I hear it smells like hot dog water.
The base of the world's finest gravies!
Oh God, it wasn't the "mdb" McCusker dude, was it? 'Cause that would bring the lameness full-circle.
It was not.
Geeze Jamie. How do you think I got *MY* job?
You never had a cubicle near mine!
hence being employed.
Wow, I should totally put on my resume that, back around 1996, we exchanged email on some technical subject I've long since forgotten...
Oh, wait, I'm not a dipshit. (Well, not most of the time.)
I can beat you there. Not only did Jamie respond to a newsgroup post of mine, but he SAVED IT AND YEARS LATER ">REPOSTED IT! That means he thought our INTERACTION WAS VALUABLE! Thus VALIDATING MY WORTH AS A HUMAN BEING!
I find that funny as I once posted a comment about Netscape's blink tag and jwz to a non-technical usenet group and got email from him explaining that he wasn't personally responsible for that one.
I blame him anyway.
A couple of friends of mine claim to have known the guy who was personally responsible for the blink tag, before he moved to California to seek his fortune. He was actually proud of it, they say.
IIRC, he wasn't responsible for it, merely for making it's blink pattern mil-spec compliant. :)
I read about you once on slashdot.
Has anyone mentioned how slashdot now has a "you get to drink from the firehose" link?
unfortunately either the thing's not online/indexable or I'm just not google-proficient enough to find it.
Because that'd make some damn funny reading right there.
WHEN I AM A THOUSAND-DOLLAR-AN-HOUR SHRINKOLA YOU WILL KNOW THAT I GOT MY JOB THROUGH EXCERPTS OF OUR CHATLOGS IN MY COVER LETTER.
Did he get the job?
My husband thinks we would get along because we're both "droll about people trying to be cool". Hmmm ...
Hey - said husband also told me that you own the DNA lounge now. I remember that place from when I lived in SF in 1987. Oh god. I'm old.
GOLD! i am putting that we discussed bad movies and bands together for my resume'. I am sure that will get me the job of my dreams.
Perhaps not getting caught in the netting is a critical skill required for his new job.
Are you the guy that wrote Minesweeper? If so, YOU ARE AWESOME!!1!1!
You know, a web browser is kind of like minesweeper for the net. You click on links, and if you end up at sites like goatse.cx or tubgirl, you lose.
Pre-LJ, we had a rich email conversation (Me: "Hi! You don't know me! Come to our show!" JWZ: "Nope," pleasantly), in which you explained that you didn't like the Maritime Hall.
I know that is an opinion that you only share with your nearest and dearest.
As a result, I felt that we became much closer when I played at the MH and got electrocuted. It was clear that you were looking out for me, and trying to teach me a valuable lesson.
Post-LJ, I keep a carefully-folded picture of your dental cast in my wallet, so that I can try to recognize you on the street. I am not sure what the message is this time, but I can sense we are closer to being BFF. I am trying to leverage this connection into a better-paying job, so that I can afford to get a tattoo of the dental cast on the back of my hand, which will make it easier to recognize you.
Right now, I have to hold the picture in one hand, which leaves only one hand free to pry the person's mouth open so I can see their right-side molars.
Can you post your number here, in case they want to call my references? Or at least, a picture of the inside of the cast?
Wow. When's the last time you actually had a cubicle?
I can only imagine what would spawn that concept.
His cover letter:
Dear sir or madam,
I would like to apply for the position of Chief Stalker. As you can see by my resume and police report, I have considerable background in stalking and exemplary skill in Being Near Famous People Without Them Knowing. I assure you that the collection of restraining orders I have is only a small subset of the many such operations I have, as you can tell from the collection of attached photographs and video clips.
ROR!
Technical Skills: I was totally in the first jwz kiloloser.
jwz replied to a comment from me once. I have jwz in my mailbox. I'm significant!
Wow. I used the right-side-up version of that animated gif on My First Websiteâ„¢ in 9th grade, which was hideous and terrible to behold. I never thought I'd see any part of it again.
That's nothing. I have email from Kirsten Dunst and Allah Himself. Both of whom want to sell me C1al1$, for some reason...
I put on my resume that I read your journal. I think prospective employers are impressed that I can read. (I don't tell them about the pictures.)
You know, I think most of them are trying to be funny, but you really seriously do have the creepiest fucking fanboys...
did they phone you up for a reference?... i get those and i have no idea who the guy is (it's always a guy)...
There's a million male programmers, and there's me! for some reason i stand out and they think i like them..
*go figure*
maybe you're .. ummm.. memorable too?
I once mentioned to a friend (social, but we'd previously worked in the same place) that I'd been cube neighbours with Dave Raggett.
He then admitted he'd snaffled Raggett's wastepaper bin and still kept it as a souvenir. Just think of all the tags that must have been consigned to that...
(Does anyone even remember Netscape and the 3.0 wars?)
I've seen a lot of things on these here intertubes, but I've never seen someone use a real blink tag in civilized conversation.
*yawn*
Marquees are much more common than blink, for better or worse.
Is this where people calculate their jwz number and brag about how low it is?
I think I'm 4 degrees away, that makes me pretty 1337 right?
Ah, Netscape. It all feels so golden glowey now. We used to hang on Netscape's every release, maxing out the office connection. Fer crissakes, I remember eagerly running netscape 0.x whatever it was.
I remember the Netscape webcam that screened the words we typed in. The Netscape office, what we could see of it, seemed a veritable palace wherein the future frothed, I kid you not! If JWZ had a cubicle, and it seemed unlikely, then it would have been gold-lined and fleecy. We were such bloody fan-boys, but hey I enjoyed it while the fun lasted. Netscape were leading us to the promised land and I wrote my first Perl CGI script. 15 years later, I'm still writing scripts. Ummm. I suppose it beats self-flagellation.
I started out in 1991 on the CERN command line bowser, which SUCKED. I think the next one I used was NCSA Mosaic. I jumped from that to Netscape in the 0.x releases. I even purchased Netscape Gold 1.22, and I still have it. ;-)
JWZ did indeed have a cube, at it was lined, but not with gold and fleece.
I started out in 1991 on the CERN command line bowser [...] the next one I used was NCSA Mosaic
Oh, you missed the fun of the interim ones.. like viola, and ... hmm, I've finally forgotten the others. For the early, pre-NCSA years of the web, all the browsers other than the line mode one would compile only if you had a machine identical to the author's.
I think the best feature of Mosaic was that you actually stood a chance of being able to run it on your platform.
(FWIW, the line mode browser ran on just about everything, including VMS and VM/CMS (both big at CERN at the time), and even if you had a printing terminal. It was like ed(1) or vi(1)-- it might not be fun to use, but at least it'd be there and work.)
Oh, I played with some others - those were my main browsers. lynx, links, and now elinks on the commnd line. Spyglass Mosaic, and others. You can walk down memory lane here: http://browsers.evolt.org/
Now you make a resume, and put down that this guy had a cubicle near you. Then he'll put down on his resume that you put down on your resume that he had a cubicle near you.
It's just an oblique way of communicating to a potential employer that he is able to cope with high levels of ambient cynicism.
Hell, I put on my resume that I read your blog.
When did humor become acceptable on a resumè?
I put on my resume that I commented on your blog?
I should put on mine that I stole your computer. And later inherited the ToD.
jwz touched me with his noodly appendage once.
...or was that dmose?
I got to actually *see* his cubicle at a job *before* netscape, not to mention the actual netscape cubicle. I also had an accidental elevator ride with a netscape founder during which, what the two of us being alone in there and all, was clearly my golden opportunity to make my pitch for something or other. And that's why, today, I'm rich and famous.
JWZ is the person from my profession / time who I most envy and would least want to be. Well, not really, but it sounds catchy, doesn't it?
Can I have some money, now?
-t