the future of high speed pizza delivery


25 Responses:

  1. styroteqe says:

    yar, read about those the other day... seems just a wee bit of crackhead engineering. i wonder how many test pilots it will turn into nuggets.

  2. boggyb says:

    Now where did I see something similar recently...

    Ah yes, Top Gear (note: page will be updated with next show tomorrow evening). Racing a Cayenne Turbo against someone pretending to be a flying squirrel.

    There's the entire episode in realplayer format available from here (may be restricted to UK only, will be replaced with next episode tomorrow evening).

  3. nosrialleon says:

    Honey, fetch the broom! Pizza boy's caught in the tree again...

  4. gwferguson says:

    Why am I thinking of Wile E. Coyote and the Acme Company?

  5. ydna says:

    Yeah, but where do I stash my katana?

    • grok_mctanys says:

      As a Deliverator V2.0, you will find the extra dimension available to you with the Gryphon over previous modes of pizza transportation renders such personal defense items obsolete. Also, as the Gryphon is made almost entirely of plastic, you will have many fewer problems with Kouriers slowing you down. We therefore expect to be able to offer our customers a _20_ minute guaranteed pizza delivery service sometime in the near future.

      (We are still looking into how to prevent Aleuts with personal thermonuclear devices from interfering with this proposal. We hope to be able to Reason with them.)

      -- Uncle Enzo.

  6. sherbooke says:

    At least with this, I'd have a better chance of rescuing the president

  7. sherbooke says:

    Do I really need a course in History and Moral Philosophy to fly this thing?

  8. waider says:

    [The Deliverator's] uniform is black as activated charcoal, filtering the very light out of the air. A bullet will bounce off its arachnofiber weave like a wren hitting a patio door, but excess perspiration wafts thorugh it like a breeze through a freshly napalmed forest. Where his body has bony extremities, the suit has a sintered armorgel: feels like gritty jello, protects like a stack of telephone books.

    Can't quite figure out where you'd stash the swords, though.

  9. martling says:

    With the unpowered system a soldier could glide for 50km from a 33,000ft jump.

    That's a 5:1 glide ratio. Hang gliders get at least double that, and hell, paragliders probably aren't much worse. Not to mention being cheaper and able to actually land.

    The picture clearly shows an unpowered version and the label lies, but putting a couple of model aircraft engines on it is not really going to make it any less shitty anyway.

    • basal_surge says:

      Yeah, I've seen a parachuting jumpsuit with integral fold out batwings between the arms and legs that gives only slightly less wing area than this thing (although not with that thick wing section. I'm thinking for unpowered use, you could get 50 km or more range with a folding batwingy/parafoil system with some integral struts, rather than all that solid mass.

    • lars_larsen says:

      The point is to cross a border without being picked up on radar, and not having to walk past big guys with guns.

      A hang glider is full of metal, which makes a great radar reflector. HALO jumps with a good glide ratio is the best method, and thats what these things are used for.

  10. deafscribe says:

    Starship Troopers, rock on!

  11. lroberson says:

    But can it fire a pound of bacon into the Asteroid Belt? I think Uncle Enzo would prefer to stick with sleek black cars.

  12. xthread says:

    Everyone knows that you deliver pizzas on skateboards, not batwings.

  13. lars_larsen says:

    The future of pizza delivery is UAVs. Everybody knows that.

  14. pedxing says:

    Parachute/cargo area?

    does the "/" indicate "and", or "or".