Yay, Onion!

The Onion just put their entire archive back online! They used to expire it after two months. You may remember them from such hits as: "Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over'"; "'I Provide Office Solutions,' Says Pitiful Little Man"; and "U.S. Techno-Industrial Base Eroding Due To Foreign Competition".
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25 Responses:

  1. lars_larsen says:

    This is quite possibly the best news I've heard in a long time.

  2. relaxing says:

    True story: in 1997, before I had WWW access, someone posted the "US Techno-Industrial Base Eroding" text to a local dialup BBS. I had never heard of the Onion but I fell in love with their brand of satire immediately (it sure beats Dave Barry columns.)

    • I think I missed it when it first ran in the Onion. I'm sure that I've never seen "Orrin Hatch" and "Skinny Puppy" in the same paragraph before, ever.

  3. Reading that 2001 story about the "Nightmare of Peace & Prosperity" -- it was funny at the time, but doesn't it kind of slide into just plain sad that it was such an accurate prediction?

  4. grahams says:

    I don't think it's is there entire archive... I searched for the classic "Walken on LA" article and it came back with a few unrelated results...

    Not sure what is there and what isn't, but perhaps it has something to do with the books they've published?

  5. spike says:

    Praise the Lr0d and pass the hyperlinks!

    Now all we need are complete archives of The Weekly Week, instead of just that partial archive.

    Admittedly, they do have the best Weekly Week article ever, "Bilingual Education Under Fire In Boston; Prop. 43 would end special classes in semaphore.

  6. bdu says:

    yay, the trouser downsizing is finally over!

  7. "Reagan Pyramid Nears Completion"
    Hopefully they were able to find enough slaves to complete this important project!

  8. nsfinch says:

    Sorry this is off-topic, but I felt you should be made aware of the new rape-preventing female condoms invented in South Africa.

  9. tkil says:

    Freedoms Curtailed In Defense Of Liberty

    "We live in a land governed by plurality of opinion in an open electorate, but we are now under siege by adherents of a fundamentalist, totalitarian belief system that tolerates no dissent," Attorney General John Ashcroft said. "Our most basic American values are threatened by an enemy opposed to everything for which our flag stands. That is why I call upon all Americans to submit to wiretaps, e-mail monitoring, and racial profiling. Now is not the time to allow simplistic, romantic notions of 'civil liberties' and 'equal protection under the law' to get in the way of our battle with the enemies of freedom."

    So happy to be able to link people to one of my favorite Onion stories ever...

  10. Hrm. They don't seem to have the one about 'quirky canadians' with their capital "Canada City". That had to be from like 1998, though.

  11. aris1234 says:

    Couldn't find the one about the remote control remote control. One of my faves.

  12. carbonunit says:


    An old favourite, always brings a smile.