today in Killdozer news

Man Charged With Drunken Bulldozer Ride

A man was drunk when he tried to run down two law enforcement officers while driving a 10-ton bulldozer, authorities said.

William Armstrong, 52, refused to stop as his Caterpillar excavator rumbled toward a Geauga County sheriff's deputy and Thompson Township police chief who had parked in his path Monday night. He missed the retreating officers, but damaged a parked sheriff's car.

Officers eventually persuaded the Thompson Township man to stop the vehicle. Armstrong's blood-alcohol level was .244 percent, more than three times the legal limit of 0.08, according to sheriff's tests.

"I'm glad talking worked, because I don't know how else we would have stopped him," said Sheriff Dan McClelland.

Armstrong was jailed after pleading innocent Tuesday to two felony counts of assault on a law enforcement officer. His bulldozer was confiscated by the sheriff's office.


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12 Responses:

  1. nothings says:

    Somehow I'd missed the followup on the original killdozer story about the guy eventually turning out to be dead (of an "apparent self-inflicted gunshot"... I wonder if that got investigated in detail).

    The best part of that story are the references to it as a "futuristic tank" when in the picture, it looks awfully... non-futuristic.

  2. sfslim says:

    Well, as it seems that the comments for your "zombie attack on the wedding" entry have been (rather adolescently) hax0red, I'll have to post my hearty support for your proposal here.

    Go man zombie, go.

    Sadly, a number of us Zombies will have already migrated to BRC on saturday. But some will certainly still be in SF and I'll do what I can to spread the word. Make sure that you contact Avidd/David at eatbrains with your suggestion, however. Frankly, based on how relentlessly Ms. Beljin has behaved like a spoiled upper class twit throughout this whole tempest-in-a-teacup, I would almost consider skipping a couple days on the playa just to creatively snow on her parade (and was already considering doing so before your great suggestion).

    A zombie horde intervention is a MUST.

  3. Well it seems you have got yourself a spammer. It seems to be the weather for idiots of late, I'd blame the full moon but I like full moons so I will just blame humanity in general.

    Tell ya what, I'll loan you a shovel and I'll take the shotgun and we will see whether that lovely fellow is really a zombie. Whatchya think? ;)

    I think it sounds remarkably like a plan.

    • My friend has recently started working as a nurse in a dementia ward, and she says she doesn't have to go outside to know when it's a full moon.

      Some things never change.

  4. fastfwd says:

    Friends don't let friends 'doze drunk.

  5. fantasygoat says:

    Now I'm sad I missed the spammer fun.

  6. anonymous says:

    There's a scene in GTA:San Andreas where you go around killing people with a bulldozer and then bury the construction site foreman under concrete.

    Life imitating art?

  7. This guy's a wuss though.

    What's this "officers eventually persuaded the Thompson Township man to stop the vehicle" crap?!?

    When you're in a kill dozer you don't stop for no man!