Apple iProduct. You'll buy it. And you'll like it.
Do you like Apple products? Do you live for every product announcement, every incremental upgrade, every rumor and fake screenshot? Do you wank and blare and drone and fucking gurgle about Apple products morning, noon, and night? Then get ready for iProduct. You'll be blown away. No matter what it is.
The power to buy anything -- and feel good about it.
Will it be merely an incremental improvement? Will we simply increase the storage capacity of an existing product and increase the price? Or will we remove features and capacity and reduce the price? It doesn't matter. We'll still trumpet it as a brand new product, and you'll buy it. You know you'll want it. And you know you'll pay big for it. Steve Jobs could take a dump, put it in an off-white plastic case, add two grey buttons and a small LCD display, and you'd pay $600 for it. Just fucking admit it.
( --More--( 9%) )
Current Music: Nine Inch Nails -- 10 Miles High (version) ♬