also, they're bulletproof

Doctor comes up with titanium breast implants:
A German-based doctor has invented breast implants made from titanium. Ziya Saylan, who's originally from Argentina, runs a practice in Dusseldorf. Saylan uses a fine titanium mesh he claims will stop breasts from sagging.
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16 Responses:

  1. Isn't the problem with implants that they're not soft enough?

  2. drreagan says:

    That brings new meaning to the retort "Tough Titties!"

    • loosechanj says:

      Not really. "Since the material is about as thick as breast tissue, it cannot be felt." I suppose you could consider it a sort of under the skin underwire.

  3. rawdogue says:

    Yes if knives came out of the nipples, I'd be all over it.

  4. aquitone says:

    Didn't Wolverine have Adamantium claws?

    • baconmonkey says:

      Yes, but since Adamantium was outlawed by the geneva convention, and davibowium was blocked by the RIAA, scientists have to settle for the next best thing.

      • _uriel_ says:


        'We don't have to abide by the Geneva Convention. Lemme tell ya somthin...these Terrorists have an agenda, an EVIL agenda. Our troops need Adamantium Breast Implants to thwart their plans. Now if you boys of the press will excuse me, The Mrs. has an appointment to have some monofilament-wire hair installed somewhere Top Secret, so as to thwart Terrorists...'

    • jwz says:

      I thought it was Unobtanium?

  5. nelc says:

    But tits are supposed to sag. If they don't lie down when you do, then it's a sure sign they're fake.

    But who cares, as long as they're big, right?

  6. sockrage says:

    Strippers get conditional sentences for glass attack

    VANCOUVER - Two exotic dancers in Vancouver who punctured a third stripper's breast implant with a wine glass have been given conditional sentences.

    Customers at No. 5 Orange nightclub in downtown Vancouver looked on in amazement as the three strippers, who earlier had been entertaining them on the stage, began to fight.

    During the two-against-one attack at about 11:30 p.m. on July 18, 2002, one dancer suffered a cut to her right breast from a broken wine glass, rupturing her implant.

    The two attackers were allegedly upset at the victim because of her snooty attitude, B.C. Supreme Court Justice Deborah Satanove was told.

  7. legolas says:

    Cool, a new place to put fridge magnets!