things you don't expect your mother to say at dinner

16 years ago
"He was like the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs."
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22 Responses:

  1. ravy says:
    16 years ago at 6:19 pm

    Uhm. Who?
  2. zenmonkeykstop says:
    16 years ago at 6:51 pm

    I could not, would not, on a boat.
    I will not, will not, with a goat.

    &c
  3. doctorow says:
    16 years ago at 8:14 pm

    That is all.
  4. doctorow says:
    16 years ago at 8:15 pm

    That is all.

    (disregard earlier message. Fucking Moz.)
  5. giles says:
    16 years ago at 8:17 pm

    I don't think I'd expect my mother to say that at an international conference on fellatio and children's literature, much less at the dinner table.
  6. fzou says:
    16 years ago at 8:38 pm

    What statement or question preceeded this one?
    • jwz says:
      16 years ago at 8:52 pm

      Don't any of you people understand comedy?
      • technotronic says:
        16 years ago at 9:24 pm

        Oh! It was a joke! I see..

        Joke: n (jōk): Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

        So, I'm supposed to *laugh*! HAHAHAHAHA!

        I'm such a fucking smartass.
      • robcallahan says:
        16 years ago at 9:44 pm

        Does anayone truly understand comedy?

        See also,
        A Mother's Guide to Emotional Castration
        (or What Kids Really Don't Want to Know About Mom&Dad's Genitals)
  7. lproven says:
    16 years ago at 10:05 pm

    My ex's first serious partner after her divorce asked his mum for advice on all sorts of things. Like, "mum, is it ok to have oral sex with a woman who's menstruating?"

    So she told him the best technique.

    Is is me, or is that... a little odd?
  8. rearkick says:
    16 years ago at 10:09 pm

    "He was like the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs."

    So what can we assume about this guy?

    A) he's gay.
    B) He likes to rhyme with his mouth full.
    C) He wears a giant, stupid ass, hat.

    -RearKick
  9. denshi says:
    16 years ago at 10:39 pm

    Forget you, I want to read your mother's lj.
  10. baconmonkey says:
    16 years ago at 10:57 pm

    but what about grandma?
  11. livejournalsux says:
    16 years ago at 11:09 pm

    The top 10 Dr. Seuss Books rejected by his Publisher:

    10. The Cat in the Microwave
    9. Herbert the Pervert Likes Sherbert
    8. Your Colon Can Moo--Can You?
    7. The Fox in Detox
    6. The Grinch's Ten Inches
    5. One Bitch, Two Bitch, Dead Bitch, Blue Bitch
    4. Zippy the Gerbil
    3. My Pocket Rocket Needs a Socket
    2. Who Shat in the Hat?
    1. Horton Hires a Ho
  12. merovingian says:
    16 years ago at 1:51 am

    I hope that one day, we can all be the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs.
  13. tjcrowley says:
    16 years ago at 2:02 am

    Would you, could you, with a goat?
    Would you, could you, in a boat?