things you don't expect your mother to say at dinner
"He was like the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs."
Tags: perversions
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Uhm. Who?
Dude, don't go asking the obvious question that's going to spoil the humor. Just roll with it. Life is full of mystery.
Gotcha. Rolling.
I could not, would not, on a boat.
I will not, will not, with a goat.
&c
I will take one here or there
I will take one ANYWHERE!
That is all.
That is all.
(disregard earlier message. Fucking Moz.)
Mozzila knows best. The first version is funnier.
I don't think I'd expect my mother to say that at an international conference on fellatio and children's literature, much less at the dinner table.
What statement or question preceeded this one?
Don't any of you people understand comedy?
Oh! It was a joke! I see..
Joke: n (jÅk): Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.
So, I'm supposed to *laugh*! HAHAHAHAHA!
I'm such a fucking smartass.
Does anayone truly understand comedy?
See also,
A Mother's Guide to Emotional Castration
(or What Kids Really Don't Want to Know About Mom&Dad's Genitals)
My ex's first serious partner after her divorce asked his mum for advice on all sorts of things. Like, "mum, is it ok to have oral sex with a woman who's menstruating?"
So she told him the best technique.
Is is me, or is that... a little odd?
"He was like the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs."
So what can we assume about this guy?
A) he's gay.
B) He likes to rhyme with his mouth full.
C) He wears a giant, stupid ass, hat.
-RearKick
Don't forget the questions it brings up on how she happens to know this information. Experience?
Forget you, I want to read your mother's lj.
but what about grandma?
Very nice.
The top 10 Dr. Seuss Books rejected by his Publisher:
10. The Cat in the Microwave
9. Herbert the Pervert Likes Sherbert
8. Your Colon Can Moo--Can You?
7. The Fox in Detox
6. The Grinch's Ten Inches
5. One Bitch, Two Bitch, Dead Bitch, Blue Bitch
4. Zippy the Gerbil
3. My Pocket Rocket Needs a Socket
2. Who Shat in the Hat?
1. Horton Hires a Ho
I hope that one day, we can all be the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs.
Would you, could you, with a goat?
Would you, could you, in a boat?