things you don't expect your mother to say at dinner

"He was like the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs."

22 Responses:

  1. I could not, would not, on a boat.
    I will not, will not, with a goat.


  2. doctorow says:

    That is all.

    (disregard earlier message. Fucking Moz.)

  3. giles says:

    I don't think I'd expect my mother to say that at an international conference on fellatio and children's literature, much less at the dinner table.

  4. fzou says:

    What statement or question preceeded this one?

    • jwz says:

      Don't any of you people understand comedy?

      • technotronic says:

        Oh! It was a joke! I see..

        Joke: n (jōk): Something said or done to evoke laughter or amusement, especially an amusing story with a punch line.

        So, I'm supposed to *laugh*! HAHAHAHAHA!

        I'm such a fucking smartass.

      • robcallahan says:

        Does anayone truly understand comedy?

        See also,
        A Mother's Guide to Emotional Castration
        (or What Kids Really Don't Want to Know About Mom&Dad's Genitals)

  5. lproven says:

    My ex's first serious partner after her divorce asked his mum for advice on all sorts of things. Like, "mum, is it ok to have oral sex with a woman who's menstruating?"

    So she told him the best technique.

    Is is me, or is that... a little odd?

  6. rearkick says:

    "He was like the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs."

    So what can we assume about this guy?

    A) he's gay.
    B) He likes to rhyme with his mouth full.
    C) He wears a giant, stupid ass, hat.


  7. denshi says:

    Forget you, I want to read your mother's lj.

  8. The top 10 Dr. Seuss Books rejected by his Publisher:

    10. The Cat in the Microwave
    9. Herbert the Pervert Likes Sherbert
    8. Your Colon Can Moo--Can You?
    7. The Fox in Detox
    6. The Grinch's Ten Inches
    5. One Bitch, Two Bitch, Dead Bitch, Blue Bitch
    4. Zippy the Gerbil
    3. My Pocket Rocket Needs a Socket
    2. Who Shat in the Hat?
    1. Horton Hires a Ho

  9. merovingian says:

    I hope that one day, we can all be the Dr. Seuss of blowjobs.

  10. tjcrowley says:

    Would you, could you, with a goat?
    Would you, could you, in a boat?