As Authorized by The Telecommunication Breakdown Act of 1995

Activating the EBN

How can I activate the Emergency Broadcast Network?

When requesting to activate the EBN you will need to send your request to All requests must include a detailed report listing the specific reasons for activating the EBN. Each request must first be approved by your local church elders before submitting it to EBN. If the local church does not have an eldership then the request must be approved by the local church membership before submitting it to EBN for world broadcast. Your request must include the name of the person making the request along with the name of congregation, e-mail address, telephone number and mailing address of your church. If applicable, the names of the local preacher and church elders including their e-mail addresses and telephone numbers will be required. Once the EBN is activated any church leader or church member connected to EBN will be able to post news and messages regarding the emergency.

[*] see also

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3 Responses:

  1. baconmonkey says:

    Some may ask, Why rock out now?
    The answer is clear - these are the times that rock men's souls.
    I instructed our military commanders to totally rock Baghdad.

  2. cryllius says:

    The stuff on their message board is great.

    "I do have thirty years experience in the virtuebios and Destinial Engineering."

    "The first 'half' of the 'year of recompense' is nearly complete, 300 days. The second 'half', 'half a time', 60 days, is about to begin. This coinsides with the 'day of clouds', the 'times of the gentiles' being fulfilled. 'In her month they will find her'. Her month is July. It will be 300 days since the towers fell. The sanctuary shall be cleansed after 2300 days. Two days; 2000 years have already passed. 300 days were left over, also a 'half a time'. There are two harlots of the old testament and one of the new. The verse mentioned has bearing on both old and new. Therefore come out of her my people today. The light of the sun will be sevenfold, as the light of seven days. Do not hesitate."

    And so on... one even tells of how mad cow disease will bring on armageddon:

    "Another predicts that half the British people, some 30 million, will be left brain-dead by 2010."

  3. rpkrajewski says:

    More Gulf War subversion nostalgia: Modern TV.