"Hi, we're from the Raleigh branch of the Secret Service," two agents said. "And they flip out their little ID cards, and I was like, 'What?'

"And they say, 'We're here because we have a report that you have un-American material in your apartment.' And I was like, 'What? No, I don't have anything like that.'

" 'Are you sure? Because we got a report that you've got a poster that's anti-American.'

(And I'm sure by now you've heard about the Snitch Program: www.smh.com.au, www.citizencorps.gov)