Movie studio capitulates to Christians who complained about "historical inaccuracies" in Noah, a film about a man who fit all the animals ever into a single boat, sans provisions, and lived.

Scott Eric Kaufman:

"God, why did you create so many fucking idiots?"

Given that I also write for The Onion, I feel I should point out that this article is not from The Onion. But if we were better people -- did less of that awful sinning against the Lord and stuff -- we could live in a world where it would be.

(Also, the movie looks like a giant stinky turd.)

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