Important photo advice

What I've Learned From My Side Job Critiquing Dick Pics

The obvious question, then, is what makes a good dick pic? I'm often asked this, and I consistently repeat a few key tips: don't send a log. Realize the power of your hands to transform a dick pic from ordinary to wettie-inducing. Pay attention to the background and setting of your picture, and understand how off-putting a visible pile of dirty laundry or extremely mundane collection of shower gels can be. Be aware that even a very small amount of thought and consideration for the desires of your receiver will set you apart from most dick pic senders, and take advantage of that by putting more than three second's thought into the pose, composition and lighting of your picture. Having said that, though, it's difficult to prescribe an ideal dick pic. Some of the most memorable pictures I've received I never saw coming. I wouldn't have thought to recommend dusting your half-naked body with bone fragments, for example.

Previously, previously, previously.

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3 Responses:

  1. Thank you for my new favorite tumblr. Funny as shit.

  2. Jessica Beth says:

    That chick is AMAZING. I've enjoyed the combo of solid aesthetics and lack of body-shaming in her reviews; that's rare around such a sexual subject.

    That being said.........it's not like I'm a good enough person to NOT be tempted to send her what popped up (*uh...huh huh*) in my feed just now:

    http://gawker.com/philadelphia-searching-for-swiss-cheese-masturbator-1499378012