USDA Guide to Obliterating Animal Carcasses With Explosives

"Horseshoes should be removed to minimize dangerous flying debris."

"Use more explosives than shown in the examples on large animals like moose, especially if total obliteration is desired."

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24 Responses:

  1. pavel_lishin says:

    Wasn't this a metal band/album/song?

  2. Ry Jones says:

    What are you doing next weekend? Let me know if you want to stop by and blow stuff up. For free. I can't let you make them or handle them, but you can watch at very close range.

    I'll be there from Friday to Sunday; the best airport to fly in to is Lewiston, Idaho. Saturday is the best day for free-form blowing things up. lmk

    • David says:

      You left out the most important detail: would he need to bring his own moose carcass or is that gratis?

      • Ry Jones says:

        He would need to supply the carcass, but I find everyone has a particular old laptop or computer they would like to see evaporate.

  3. Tony says:

    Should this ever become of more than academic interest, note that there is an error. 1 pound is not, not, NOT the same as 45 kg. That kind of thing sorta matters when you're dealing with explosives. :-)

  4. Alden says:

    This is going to be less fun once someone invents a disintegrator ray gun.

  5. Lloyd says:

    Ah, uncompressible waterbags atop explosives. That reminds me of explosive forming of satellite dishes.

    • phuzz says:

      I'd never heard of that before, cool!
      It's probably a good thing I have no access to explosives.

  6. Different Jamie says:

    I'm not sure if it is a good thing that the didn't illustrate the obvious, by shoving dynamite up the rhetorical horse's ass. I'm personally glad that I have no real-world experience with detonating dead things, so I must say I don't know if that is an optimal method. But I'm sure, in the history of detonating carcasses, it has been tried, and explaining why it is suboptimal (even if it is just mental health care insurance rates) would reduce the wonder.

    Maybe that is on the page for managers.

  7. Joe says:

    Blaster Examiner sounds like a pretty awesome job.