Just spit on your hand and see what's gurgling around in there

Surgeons remove toy stuck in woman's vagina for 10 years

The Scottish woman took herself to hospital complaining that she was tired, incontinent, and losing weight. Upon examination, doctors were surprised to find a five-inch sex toy protruding into her bladder from her vagina.

The 38-year-old reported using the toy one drunken night with her partner 10 years ago, noting she couldn't remember whether she had removed it.

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Lucy

Holy crap, Lucy is the best movie I've seen this year!

This movie is a Singularitarian Limitless with a protagonist who isn't a moron.

Science fiction -- I am a fan. And if you've ever heard me sneer at a movie, I've probably said some variant of "bad science, worse fiction", because most self-professed "science fiction" movies and TV are actually fantasy with lasers.

In fantasy, the answer to the question of "why is this possible" is "because the plot demands it".

In science fiction, the answer to that question is "because that's the logical consequence of the 'what if' we proposed in the opening scene."

Without giving too many spoilers, this movie is really solid. But I have some script notes...

Basically everything that Morgan Freeman's character says makes me want to punch myself in the face. The whole "10% of your brain" thing has been discredited for decades, and if you hear someone trot it out then they're probably the kind of person who gets their evidence from I Fucking Love Science or other sources of GIF factoids about astrology woo energy.

But! He's just some schmuck in a movie! Not a reliable narrator. I can tolerate him as some character who's just wrong about what's happening. That's fine. But seriously though, throw me a bone? I think that whoever actually wrote the first draft of this thing was of My People, and really, if Lucy had hung a goddamned lantern on it, and thrown out even a single line like, "It's pheromones, nanties, and designer retroviruses, ok? You wouldn't understand" it would have... really pulled that room together.

But in any script, the ending is where it's your game to lose. And about 15 minutes from the end, I kept saying to myself, "Do the 2001 ending, do the 2001 ending."

I'll just say that I found the ending satisfying -- as satisfying as in Her.

Also, stylistically speaking -- 10 minutes in, I turned to my friend and asked, "Wait, is this a Luc Besson movie?" Because I had forgotten that it's a Luc Besson movie. But yeah, it hits those signature notes.

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Today in Meatsack Furniture News

Gigi Barker:

Moulded silicone is used as a base to create a series of squidgy seats designed to mimic rolls of fat. The silicone is mixed with human pheromones and aftershave so the seats have the smell of skin as well as the appearance.

Long Live the New Couch.

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Current Music: Dwntwn -- Skins ♬

Anatomy of Songs

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Clipping Planes, Cake Edition

Chocolate Mill

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Hey, I made a robot


Based on the above photo, obviously. I'm hoping to 3D-print award statues for the winners of the DNA Lounge Cocktail Robotics Grand Challenge that will resemble the flyer. Since anything worth doing is worth over-doing, I geared it up so that turning the crank will move the feet! (Assuming I got it right on the first try.) I don't think you can print springs, though, so I didn't go that far.

Incidentally, Maya is a pain in the ass.

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Exterminate All Rational Emoticons

@libraryofemoji: Randomly generated speculations about what emoji might appear in upcoming Unicode versions.

TWO FRICATIVE OVERALLS
TWO SCABS
SAGACIOUSLY SEEDY FORMULATION
PHANTASMAGORICAL SYMBOL FOR THREE DISAPPEARANCES
RIGHT ECHIDNA
THREE LUBBERS
ACCOMMODATION NEXT TO FOLLICULAR BATHHOUSE
OKINAWA UNDER GRID OSTIARY
UNCERTAINLY POLYVALENT SPELL
THREE CALVINS OUTSIDE OF REPRESENTATION PESTILENCE
LARGE ONOSMODIUM
VOUCHER ABOVE TWO RESPONDENTS
ANTICLOCKWISE GREASER
CAPSAICIN
CYTOLOGIST SIGN
LARGE HEAVY ABLATION
ASTONISHING PROBABILITY SYMBOL

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Zalgo Classics

Hedi Xandt:

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A People's History of Tattooine

Untold and misunderstood stories of racism and droid prejudice:

@harrisj What if Mos Eisley wasn't really that wretched and it was just Obi Wan being racist again?
Mos Eisley may not look like much but it's a a bedroom community with decent schools and affordable housing.
@tcarmody You can just imagine Obi-Wan after years of being a Jedi on Coruscant being stuck in this place and just getting madder and madder.
@harrisj yeah nobody cares that the blue milk is so much more artisanal on Coruscant
I also imagine Tosche Station as some sort of affluent suburban mall where Luke just goes to loiter when bored.
all I'm saying is that for a place he allegedly hates, Obi Wan sure knows exactly where the best cantina is
maybe what Obi Wan really hates is himself for having a good time and enjoying the cantina scene
@davin Old Sgt. Major Kenobi was this close to muttering "bloody wogs" under his breath.
Kenobi prefers the obliging company of droids which, long story, accounts in part for the Cantina's policy against them.
@fhwang You can't be mad at Obi Wan. That's just how all the Jedi talked back then.
@skottk Face it - Obi-Wan killed Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru in order to let Luke to sell his speeder for funds to leave the planet.
@harrisj and the Greater Mos Eisley Business Improvement District doesn't care about the rantings of a separatist hermit
@anildash You're all talking small potatoes. Big story is Palpatine's equity in Sienar Systems.

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Enormous And Rare Coprolite

Estimate $8,000-10,000.

This truly spectacular specimen is possibly the longest example of coprolite - fossilized dinosaur feces - ever to be offered at auction. It boasts a wonderfully even, pale brown-yellow coloring and terrifically detailed texture to the heavily botryoidal surface across the whole of its immense length. The passer of this remarkable object is unknown, but it is nonetheless a highly evocative specimen of unprecedented size, presented in four sections, each with a heavy black marble custom base, an eye-watering 40 inches in length overall.

Miocene-Oligocene Wilkes Formation, Toledo, Lewis Co., Washington.

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